Ah yes, nothing screams Underdog like the cover of this single from Kasabian. Why is that the case, when the cover has nothing other than the name of the song and the band on it, well it is clear that the designer is an underdog and does not understand the complexities of producing artwork for singles and albums. The remix helps him (or her) out by showing an underdog who, in this case, is a poor helpless babe made to act out the life of a dog, in the freezing cold snow for good measure (well it is December). Woof!

We begin December with a suitably seasonal triple-play remix from George Michael. The original cover artwork for his song, December Song (I Dreamed Of Christmas) shows an odd stack of televisions, a mouse and some badly drawn people. The first of our remixes shows a cold December angel who appears to be dreaming of Christmas. The final remix shows a babe who is clearly very into the idea of Christmas, and is dreaming of someone giving her a hot cup of coffee as she is standing around on a street corner in her Christmas outfit looking very chilly. Merry!

Sandie Shaw sings about a Puppet On A String, but on the cover of her single there is only a picture of Ms Shaw. There is no sign of any puppet and nor is there any indication of the string on which the puppet is strung. On the remix we find a babe tied up with string, or at least tied up with something, and dangling from a rope. So the only question that remains is whether or not she is a puppet. Then again, perhaps that question really doesn't need an answer, just enjoy. Marionette!

Let's play word association... 'Rock Bottom'... Did you think of a man and a woman resting their chins on their fists, wearing waistcoat suits and red flowers? No? Well apparently that's what Lynsey De Paul and Mike Moran thought of when they were given the choice to select a picture for the cover of their single. When we though or rock bottom, we thought of a hot babe with a rock solid ass standing looking over a rocky landscape. That's just how our mind works, and we feel all the better for it. Granite!

Pointy, pointy, ooh la, la, pointy pointy. That is how the lyrics of On Point by House Of Pain might have gone if they'd left them to have been written by an idiot. But the lyrics are not what concerns us, it's just the artwork that we feature. The original cover shows the band, well almost. The remix shows a babe to whom the lyrics pointy, pointy, ooh la, la, pointy pointy would actually have applied very well. Apex!

What could be more iconic than Louboutins when it comes to shoes? And on the original single cover artwork we find that Jennifer Lopez does appear to be wearing said shoes which we know as the heels are painted red. Full marks on the AllBum.Art score card for a cover that shows the artist and the title. So in this sense, the remix is worse in that Ms Lopez is gone, and all that we are left with is a different babe who also appears to be wearing a pair of Louboutin shoes with their red soles. Oddly, that's all she is wearing. Spike!

While I Shovel The Snow, it seems that The Walkmen are not going to help but are going to stand around under a bridge staring towards the icy river beyond. Thankfully, on the remix, we find a babe who is more than willing to help shovel the snow, and she has all the necessary equipment, including a snow shovel and some sturdy winter boots. On the other hand, she seems to have forgotten the rest of her winter outfit. Guess you can't have everything, can you? Complete!

When Whitney Houston tells is that I Have Nothing, we don't believe this to be strictly true. Not least, the original single cover artwork shows her to have a nice black dress. On the remix we find a babe who really does have nothing. Not only does she not have a dress to wear, but it seems that even if she was wearing a dress she has none of the womanly curves that would fill it out nicely as up top she has nothing either. Flatties!

A triple-play of remixes and ones that fall within our 'X-rated remixes' category. The original cover for Clair Hicks And Love Exchange is nothing more than the title of the song and the name of the band against a marbled backdrop. The two remixxes follow an identical theme, that of one babe pushing in the bush (see definition number 11 in case this whole thing doesn't make sense) of another girl. On the first the pushing has already been quite successful. On the second (where it oddly appears that the babes concerned are dressed as schoolgirls) the pushing has a little further to go, though the pained look on the girl who is being pushed into's face suggests it might be time to stop. Fist!

The original cover for the Ohio Players album Ouch! shows a babe who appears to have gotten something stuck in her ass, and is experiencing a certain amount of pain extracting it, but it is not clear what is stuck there. On the remi-xxx (yes another of our xxx-rated remixes) the situation becomes clearer as we find that the babe concerned appears to have a string of beads stuck up her ass. What we can't confirm, however, is that this is causing her any pain. Extract!