The Christmas Song - Nat King Cole 

Original Cover Artwork of Nat King Cole The Xmas Song As the Holiday season is fast approaching, it seems right to focus on seasonal songs, especially those that have stood the test of time. The Christmas Song, first recorded by Mr Nat King Cole in 1946 is one of those Christmas classics. Everyone knows the lyrics which revolve around Mr King Cole roasting chestnuts on an open fire. It is note clear whose chestnuts he is roasting (they could be his own or that of a guest who has called in to visit and brought them along), but the idea of an open fire and the chocolatey smooth voice of Mr Cole at Christmas time is enough to warm anyone's chestnuts.

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Cover Artwork Remix of Nat King Cole The Xmas Song Through extensive research, it appears that it was in fact a rather sexy model whose chestnuts Mr King was attempting to roast. This alternative cover for the single shows the real situation. It is also possible that the chestnuts are metaphorical and are a saucy reference to the nuts on this lady's chest which are perilously close to the open fire such that they will no doubt be getting roasting hot. Then again, one suspects that in the presence of this lady, most things will get roasting hot. On the other hand, without the open fire, one wonders whether she would be racing to display her chestnuts as amply as she is doing here.

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Rockin' Around The Christmas Tree - Brenda Lee 

Original Cover Artwork of Rockin Round The Xmas TreeContinuin' with the Christmas theme, this time it is the turn of that Holiday classic, Rockin' Around The Christmas Tree. Though many versions of the song have been recorded over the years, this particular artwork is taken from the 1957 version sung by Brenda Lee, which many consider to be the original. In this cover, we see Ms Lee herself in a green dress set against a green background - not particularly inventive as color schemes go. It is fair to say that she doesn't look as if she is particularly full of seasonal spirit. But perhaps in Georgia from where Ms Lee originates, wearing a pretty dress is as much as anyone can afford to do and the idea of Santa hats or elf outfits is beyond folks' everyday means.

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Original Cover Artwork of Rockin Round The Xxmas TreeIn the revised single cover we see two ladies who are most definitely filled with the spirit of the season. This is evident as they appear to be sat in front of a Christmas tree in only their bikinis, playing in the snow. Without a bit of seasonal spirit to help keep them warm, one would expect them to seek somewhere less chilly to have their photos taken. Red bikinis with white fur are often popular in December, especially in Canada where they are obligatory for all women who are both under the age of 25 and under 125 pounds in weight. This law was enacted in 1925 and is known locally as the 25-25-125 rule. Although now somewhat outmoded, it is still popular and has defied attempts by the modern day legislature to nullify it.

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Let It Snow! - Michael Bublé 

Original Cover Artwork of Let It Snow Michael Buble As Christmas approaches, attention is increasingly being turned to those old festive crackers. The cover for Canadian crooner Michael Bublé's 2003 EP 'Let It Snow!' has to be one of the least inventive pieces of album art for a Christmas song that has ever been produced. Remember that the song on which the title is based includes the line 'the weather outside is frightful', whilst the cover is all sparkly and icy and nice. There is no indication that the snowflakes will lead to frightful weather conditions. Added to this, Mr Bublé's smooth voice, the ensuing mood is more one of 'chestnuts roasting on an open fire', though presumably if Mr Bublé's chestnuts did roast on said fire, his voice might not be quite so smooth.

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Cover Artwork Remix of Let It Snow Michael Buble Speaking of festive crackers and frightful weather, the girl here on the revised cover certainly does appear to be in inclement, snowy, weather conditions. Of course it goes without saying that if you insist on calling yourself 'Michael Booob-lay' when, in reality, your name would more averagely be pronounced 'Michael Bubb-ler' you will inevitably become the butt of boob gags. Sadly, at AllBum.Art, such a temptation was too much to resist and the lady on the front of the new cover is definitely and definitively more deserving of the title 'Boob-lay' than the erstwhile crooner from Canada.

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Sweet Dreams (Are Made Of This) - Eurythmics 

Original Cover Artwork of Sweet Dreams EurythmicsTo be brutal, Annie Lennox the lead singer of the Eurythmics, has always had a face that would cause nightmares more than it would 'Sweet Dreams'; her scary, androgynous looks being more akin to salt and vinegar chips than smooth silky chocolate. There are, of course, those who like salt and vinegar chips and in the words of Ms Lennox herself in this 1983 single, ‘Who am I do disagree?’ But the picture of Ms Lennox on cover, no matter how small, does not elicit dreams of the sugary kind. Notwithstanding Ms Lennox’s acerbic charm, Mr Dave Stewart her partner in the band who is not, thankfully, shown on the cover, would add little by the way of counterbalancing flavour, being similar in visage to an unfashionable porcupine.

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Cover Artwork Remix of Sweet Dreams Eurythmics The revised cover is definitely something that ‘sweet dreams are made of’. Sugar and spice and all things nice. Almost. But surely even the biggest sucrophobe¹ would have to admit that the selection of desserts is highly tempting. In the song Ms Lennox points out that ‘Everybody is Looking for Something’. The meaning of this is now much more apparent. Whilst some may seek one particular type of sucrolytic² satisfaction through, for example, the medium of cake, others may find similar satisfaction in buns or tarts. Paradoxically, tarts seem to be more favoured by men who like to try many different kinds until they find one they like, whereas buns are more often preferred by females who will often test to see how firm they are before deciding which one to take.

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¹ A ‘sucrophobe’ is someone who dislikes sugary things. ‘Sucro’ is taken from ‘sucrose’ meaning sugar, and ‘phobe’ is short for ‘phobia’ meaning ‘an irrational fear or aversion to something’.

² ‘Sucrolytic’ means ‘causing pleasurable collapse through sucrorial³ intake’. ‘Sucro’ is taken from ‘sucrose’ meaning sugar, and ‘lytic’ means ‘something that causes one to break down or become loose.

³ ‘Sucrorial’ means ‘relating to or connected with sucrose (sugar)’.
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Midas Touch - Midnight Star 

Original Cover Artwork of Midnight Star Midas Touch It is great to receive submissions from people who are getting the hang of what AllBum.Art is all about. This one is from two ladies who call themselves 'Ms Holly Da Yin' and 'Ms Mary Ott'. They were rather bored by the cover for the 1986 cover of the single 'Midas Touch' by Midnight Star. The black cover with red lettering and the addition of a tiny amount of gold, did not seem, to them, to reflect the notion that 'everything' that was touched 'turned to gold'. Surely, in such a situation, the single cover itself would be completely gold (and anyone who bought it would now be very rich, given the rise in gold prices in recent years).

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Cover Artwork Remix of Midnight Star Midas Touch Ms Da Yin and Ms Ott instead fused the original cover with that of a picture of Ms Paris Hilton (a made-up name if ever there was one) who had been turned to gold. All her surroundings have also turned to gold, though it seems that the gold is still in a liquid state meaning that the temperature would have had to have been over 1,000°C. Although some regard Ms Hilton as 'hot', at this kind of temperature, surely even she would have been burned to a frazzle. Regardless of this strange contradiction, Ms Da Yin and Ms Ott are to be congratulated on their fine contribution and awarded a gold star for their efforts.

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White Wedding - Billy Idol 

Original Cover Artwork of Billy Idol White Wedding It is time to return once again to Mr Billy Idol, this time to his 1982 song 'White Wedding' again courtesy of Brent Gdzinski of Charleston, SC. There is some controversy over the meaning of the song but general agreement that being 'a nice day for a White Wedding' is less to do with the weather, and more that the idea of white weddings is connected with lace and frills and heightened emotional awareness and thus, what Mr Idol is really saying is that it is 'a nice day to go hunting for women'. In the cover of the single, if you look carefully, you will notice that the wedding dress that the girl is wearing has been undone, presumably by Mr Idol, and that it is beginning to fall off.

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Cover Artwork Remix of Billy Idol White Wedding Mr Gdzinski's update cover takes the story forward around a half an hour, where he picks up the story:
Having argued with Mr Idol about his manhandling of her dress, she has wandered off. Unfortunately, instead of heading back to the wedding breakfast, she has ended up deeper in the forest. Without a pin to repair her dress, it has fallen down, having been caught on a sharp twig.

It is to be hoped that Mr Idol shows some repentance and heads off into the forest to help out the maiden whose wedding day he has no doubt ruined.

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Bad Girls - Donna Summer 

Original Cover Artwork of Donna Summer Bad Girls Donna Summer's 1979 disco classic 'Bad Girls' was supposedly inspired after one of Donna's assistants was stopped by a police officer who thought she was a prostitute. How such a mistake could have been made is unknown, however the cover of the single shows Donna leaning against a lamp-post in typical 1970s disco garb. Presumably the police officer in question had never been to a discotheque of the time and was unfamiliar with the idea that just because a woman is wearing stockings, high heels and a skirt that is split up to the thigh does not imply that she is a prostitute but just a regular 'girl about town'.

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Cover Artwork Remix of Donna Summer Bad Girls Of course the title of Ms Summer's song is 'Bad Girls'. Note the emphasis on the plural. Yet, on the cover there is only the one girl - Ms Summer herself - in the picture. As previously stated, the fact that the clothes she is wearing are typical of the time does not really do the title justice. In this updated version, the police officer has gone and in his place are two very bad girls, in fact they are so naughty that they are standing by Ms Summer's lamp-post but, it would seem, naked other than some high heels and a hat. It is now pretty certain that if the police officer were to see them, his supposition that they were prostitutes would be much more accurate and in any case, being naked in a public place would surely call for their arrest regardless.

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Hot In The City - Billy Idol 

Original Cover Artwork of Hot In The City Originally released in 1982 but a bigger hit when re-released in 1987, Billy Idol's 'Hot In The City' was also used in the feature film 'Big'. It seems reasonable to presume, from the cover, that Mr Idol was indeed rather warm as he is not wearing any shirt. The picture of the topless Mr Idol with his big medallion and his bejeaned legs spread as if to invite the viewer to examine his crotch will have no doubt made many females at the time 'Hot In The City'. The city in question, incidentally, appears to be New York as this is the city whose name is yelled part way through the song. A 'Rebel Yell' perhaps?

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Original Cover Artwork of Hot In The CityThe lyrics to Mr Idol's song scream, 'You know that it's Hot in the City tonight'. Thank you to Brent Gdzinski of Charleston, SC, who supplied this alternative version of the cover. In Brent's words:
I felt that if it was as hot in the city as Mr Idol made out, the ladies of the said city would keep cool by walking the streets naked. Indeed, this has proved to be the case as I went out in the city the other night when it was hot and saw this lady trying to keep cool. I thought it would make a fitting cover.

Brent has a point there, and we thank him for his submission and look forward to seeing what results from the next hot night in Charleston.

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Power - Ice-T 

Original Cover Artwork of Ice T Power The cover for Ice-T's album 'Power' is already one of the sexier covers around and caused a stir at the time. According to WikiPedia:
The album cover, photographed by Glen E. Friedman, was the subject of controversy upon its original release, due to the provocative pose of Darlene Ortiz, Ice-T's girlfriend at the time.

Ms Ortiz was obviously the one with the 'Power' given that she is stood holding a whip and although she hasn't gone for the full dominatrix outfit (the white slingshot bikini not being normal mistress clothing), you get the impression that she has the upper hand over the two hapless rappers.

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Cover Artwork Remix of Ice T Power Time has moved on and Ms Ortiz is no longer Ice-T's girlfriend so the time is surely right for Ice to take back the power. Ms Ortiz has therefore been replaced by two similarly attired black beauties whose poses suggest that it is Ice-T that has the power now. With one flick of his wrists he would be nicely positioned between two topless busty babes.

Mind you, surrounded by those two, even Ice-T might find their powers of persuasion difficult to turn down!

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Spacer - Sheila & B. Devotion 

Original Cover Artwork of Sheila B Devotion Spacer OrFrench band, Sheila & B. Devotion (sometimes mistakenly called 'Sheila B Devotion') hit the charts in 1979 with the disco classic 'Spacer'. The song has since been sampled extensively by, for example, Alcazar in their hit 'Crying at the Discotheque'. The original cover for the single is shown on the right. It features a pretty blonde in a very 1970s disco outfit of red and white trainers, 'bobby socks' and a matching red and white sleeveless baseball t-shirt. She is kneeling or squatting down on a beach, drawing in the sand with a stick.

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Cover Artwork Remix of Sheila B Devotion Spacer The 1979 version of the cover was probably quite erotic and sexy for its time, however in the 2010s, it seems a little bland and so it has been update in line with modern maxims. On the right is an updated, and much sexier, version. This time the girl on the beach is naked (but nothing is on show that you wouldn't see in a tabloid newspaper) and is in a similar pose, although she seems to have lost the stick with which to draw in the sand. She looks just as happy as her 1979 counterpart despite her being in the nude. Perhaps she is thinking, "Now, where did I leave my bobby socks...?"

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