Whoa, ooo, aah, Camouflage, things are never quite the way they seem. Though the single artwork is rather hazy on detail, showing the singer Stan Ridgway playing his harmonica. The camouflage on the original cover seems to be the result of someone painting blobs of green and purple over the picture of Mr Ridgway. On the remix is a babe wearing a camouflaged outfit, but one that has gotten torn in combat. With all that ripped material, any stealth that her outfit would have afforded has largely been lost. And she is now largely exposed. Netting!
Hey, hey, it's time for those groovesters Roxy Music. Let's flip on over to the original single front cover artwork for their single Angel Eyes. Wowsah! It shows two babes wearing earrings and would you crease it, one of them has their eye-picking eyes closed. Flute those mid-tone eyelashes. On the remix is an angel whose eyes you can clearly see, and you can also pool a gap at her outfit which is eye-catchingly transparently busting out of the hat fringe leaflet. Boom that, you ample cat bounder!
When Buggles were producing their single Clean, Clean, they must have forgotten that the cover artwork needed to somehow reflect the nature of the song. So why, then, did they opt for some bizarre shooting targets which consist of soldiers above the waste and babes below? It's very confusing and not that clean. On the remix is a babe in a bathroom. It's not clear whether she is clean herself, or in the process of cleaning. Either way, one thing that is for certain, is that she is more than likely dirty. Failure!
The Porn Kings Versus Flip & Fill Featuring 740 Boys is one hell of a name for a band. On the other hand, Shake Ya Shimmy is a less hellish title for a song. On the original single front cover artwork you will find some dude with his hand out. On the remix you will find a babe shaking her shimmy in front of an audience who seem very happy to stand and watch. Maybe they are the real porn kings who can flip and fill, or maybe there are 740 of them. That's a lot of kings, more than those who were crowns most likely. Sway!
As the Japanese say, when talking about Visions Of China by Japan:
We couldn't agree more. Ping Pong!
ピンポンとピンポン。 魚釣り用のピンポンを掘って、ポンギー用のピンポンにピングする。 あなたが卓球なしで洞窟を踊るならば、卓球が鼎を動かすことを期待してください。 鼎を鳴らして、ピンを鳴らしてください。 その歌、ポンの一つは、鳴って歌っていて、あまりにも憧れているような声でもあった。 長いピンポン、丁洞はピンポンと歌うとピンポンできません。 ポンポンポン。
We couldn't agree more. Ping Pong!
Single Covers, Singles Of The 1990s, Special Remixes, Remi-XXX-es, High Heels, Outdoors, Not Safe For WorkSenseless Things, on the original single front cover artwork, illustrate the idea of Hold It Down with some cogs. Cogs? What do they hold down? On the remix is a babe who is doing a good job of holding herself down. She is holding herself down on a footpath which is odd, as she is naked and it must be chilly on the floor. With her legs wide apart, her senseless thing is on open display (which is what makes this one of our limited series of XXX-rated remixes, in case you were wondering. Stripper!
The next two are what we call Remi-XXX-es which are those remixes that cross the Triple-X threshold. The first of our X-rated remixes shows four women stacked on top of each other, and on the floor. Start at the top and work your way through the four, to the floor. The final remix shows four babes who have got off their bikes and are sitting on the floor. Quadrangle!
Let's have another remix from Mary J Blige, and take a look at the original front cover artwork for her single Family Affair. It shows Ms Blige in a fur coat, standing next to someone who may or may not be a family member. So what family combination should we show on the remix? Father/Daughter? Mother/Son? Grandma/Grandson? Brother/Sister? How's about twin sisters, because that is the family affair that is illustrated on the remix, cheating on their partners. Incest!
Single Covers, Singles Of The 1990s, Special Remixes, Remi-XXX-es, Busty, High Heels, Not Safe For WorkJust stop for one darn minute and think. What did Mary J Blige really think that people would insinuate from the title of her song? Is it, as the original single front cover artwork for I'm Goin' Down shows, Ms Blige in a red hat? Or is it, as the remi-xxx-ed (our term for an X-rated remix) cover shows, a babe goin' down in a far more obvious way? The thing is, she has already gone down, and is not in the process of goin' down, so maybe this is as bad as the red hat she is sucking on. Ankle-strap!
The Bed's Too Big Without You, that is the problem that Sheila Hylton is facing. It looks like the bed is completely missing as on the original single front cover artwork, other than Ms Hylton, there is no evidence of a bed. On the remix is a babe sitting on a big bed on her own without you (or anyone else). She has very long legs, and very high heels, though it could be the camera angle, but no other clothes. Perhaps the bed is especially big for those reasons. Lonely!