Do you think we're alone now? Tiffany does when she sings I Think We're Alone Now. On the original single front cover artwork Ms Darwish is, without question, alone now, or so we think. On the remix, a babe is not alone, but the dude standing in front of her has probably suggested that they are alone. The babe, on the other hand, looks slightly alarmed at the prospect of being alone with the dude. That said, her sexy clothes suggest she is not unused to being alone with various dudes. Solitude!
Hold Me Now, hold you now, hold me before, hold you again, none of this helps when the original single front cover artwork by The Thomson Twinsjust shows the three band members not touching, let alone holding, anyone or anything. And they clearly are not twins either. On the remix, two twins (or is that one set of twins?) are standing next to each other, holding each other. Is it now, before or again? Then or thereafter? Does it matter when the twins are wearing nothing but their high heel sandals? Ukraine!
So a gold star for Tess Henley. Why? Because on the original front cover artwork of her album High Heels And Sneakers, we find a drawing of Ms Henley with one foot in sneakers and the other in high heels. Whether she is swapping from high heels to sneakers, or vice versa, we can not tell. On the remix is a babe who is definitely wearing high heels. There is something sneaky looking about her too. She's up to no good and of that there can be little doubt. Sneaky peak!
Yes, the band are called Made In London and the title of the song is Dirty Water. And yes, the original single front cover artwork shows the three band members standing in a field. Where, you might ask, is the water. And why, you might ask, is the water dirty? On the remix we find a babe who is squatting down inside what looks like a derelict building. And she is taking a pee. There is water around. And the water is dirty. Is she made in London? That question remains unanswered. Off!
This can get a little monotonous you know. Here we find Kelly Rowland and her single Train On A Track. but on the original single front cover artwork there are no trains, tracks or railway of any kinds, just a grinning Ms Rowland. On the remix we find a babe sitting on a track, with a train in the background. She is only wearing blue high heel shoes, which may not be that safe, but there is at least a train, on a track. Phew!
There are so many opportunities for a decent single front cover when your song is called Angry Chair and the band is called Alice In Chains. It is therefore with some significant surprise that the original artwork shows on chair, no chains and instead has a bearded dude lying down over a picture of a snake. On the remix we find a largely naked babe, other than for her stockings and heels, sitting on a chair. In front of her is another chair which is not being sat upon, and which is very angry as he wanted the babe to sit on him instead. Wooden!
Mary MacGregor is Torn Between Two Lovers which sounds as if it could be quite painful. It is not clear from the original single front cover artwork whether she is being torn at that exact moment, and her facial expression does not indicate whether she is in in pain or not. On the remix we find a babe between two dudes, one of who is trying to tear off her panties. She is being torn between two lovers! Is she in pain? It doesn't look like it from the smile on her face. Breaking point!
Probably best known for their single Christmas Wrapping, The Waitresses did have other hits including I Know What Boys Like. Based on the original single front cover artwork, what boys like is a black and white photograph of themselves on a cheap plastic table cloth. The remix seems more realistic as a babe who really knows what boys like demonstrates her logic by sitting on a chair, naked other than her high heels. Positioning!
Today's question is being posed by Take That. The question is Why Can't I Wake Up With You? The original single front cover artwork doesn't explain why they are asking this question, however the prerequisite of waking up with someone is going to sleep with them, and the band members don't look very sleepy. On the remix we find a babe lying on her bed. Maybe she is about to go to sleep. Maybe she has just woken up. She does not seem to be with anyone. Perhaps she is waiting for one of the band members. Snooze!
A Secret Love, that is what Bee Gees are singing about. They illustrate this on the original single front cover artwork by showing a tall, thin babe in a red dress standing on what might be a beach, or may be a snowy field. On the remix, on the other hand, we find a babe, also in red, and her lover who looks as if they have been caught out, and that their love should be far more secret than it is. The look on the babe's face certainly suggests that any secrecy that she might have wanted to maintain, has been broken. Surprise!