Don't Stand So Close to me by The Police is a song about a teacher getting too close to a pupil and all of the cultural taboos that risk getting broken. Not for us any of that nonsense. Instead we figured that if there was someone of a police based background that you would not want to stand too close to, it would be a stripper-gram. That may not be true, but that's what made the most attractive addition to the original cover of this single! Piggy!
Oh, dear. An album called Oral Fixation presents many options for remixing that would completely contravene the AllBum.Art submission guidelines! Having said that, Shakira points us in a direction that happily can involve a remix without guideline contravention. On the original cover we see Mr Ripoll in the nude, taking an apple from a tree, presumably in the garden of Eden. In the remix, nothing much has changed, other than that the tree in the garden is not strategically placed to cover up the shrouded nudity! Plucky!
When Dan Hartman brought us Relight My Fire, he at least tried a bit with the cover of his single, which has fire on it and shows Mr Hartman. Now whilst Mr Hartman might have lit the fire of many a 70s babe, his visage doesn't really cut it in the 21st century. And so we have replaced Mr Hartman with a babe who is ready to light any fire. But beware, she might be too hot to handle. Blazing!
There is a story here to Bon Jovi's single Runaway. In the original cover we see Mr Bongiovi standing on a darkened city street with very frizzy hair. Standing behind him is what must be the runaway mentioned in the song, who also has frizzy hair but seems to be wearing little more than high heels, stockings and a rain coat. Mr Bongiovi takes pity on her and invites her to his apartment 'to keep warm'. In the remix we see the same Mr Bongiovi back at his apartment with many of the other runaways he has 'rescued'. All of who are wearing little more than much at all. Feral!
Following on from yesterday's all-American classic, we bring you another in the form of Rhinestone Cowboy by Glen Campbell. The original cover shows Mr Campbell wearing a cowboy outfit bedecked by rhinestones which is a big thumbs-up when it comes to covers reflecting the songs they are covering. Our remix simply replaces Mr Campbell with a sexy babe wearing rhinestones (and little else) in a cowboy setting. Equally thumbsy-uppy. Duplicate!
This little ditty about Jack And Diane was brought to us in the early 1980s by John Cougar also known as John Cougar Mellencamp. It was Mr Mellencamp's full name that gave the idea for the remix. So who were Jack and Diane? In the remixed cover we can see that
- The picture of Mr Mellencamp has been replaced by a picture of a modern-day Cougar
- The Cougar in question has two very large mellencamps which she is amply displaying by lowering her blouse
- The left mellencamp is one she calls John, the one on the right is Diane
It Takes Two by Rob Base & DJ E-Z Rock is one of those songs you either love or hate, there's very little grey area in-between. The original cover shows us Mr Base and Mr Rock in a typical hip-hop pose. In this respect, it is not a bad cover at all, satisfying the main criteria for a good cover. But any cover can be improved and the remix shows two alternative people posing on the cover, in this case hot babes tied in red ribbon. Strawberry!
Don't ever say that we don't not bring you the worst of the best of the worst here at AllBum.Art. This isn't not the remix of the album Boston Tea Party that may (or may not) not have been by Arthur Fiedler And The Boston Pops Orchestra. Or it may just be a lame excuse to show a picture of two babes in nothing but sexy lingerie drinking tea. You don't not now then decide. Confudential!
This song by Roy Orbison is less 'Oh, Pretty Woman' and more 'Ah, Pretty Woman' when the enlightenment of the remixed cover exposes the woman of whom Mr Orbison so idly moans. The original lyrics of this song included the line 'take a peek, on my cheek, that's a sneak, or a banzoi tree' but it was felt to be too Japanese at a time when sentiment towards the Japanese was no better than it is today towards Canada for example. Top!