Whip My Hair (Back And Forth) is described by Urban Dictionary as an example of how humanity has failed. Maybe this is down to the original single cover artwork by Willow which shows nothing other than the young Mr Smith flailing his hair here and there. On the remix is a far better rendition of the same idea, with a busty babe whipping her hair about in a waterfall. Perhaps the remixed cover art might have helped save humanity. Splash!
Yes, the band are called Made In London and the title of the song is Dirty Water. And yes, the original single front cover artwork shows the three band members standing in a field. Where, you might ask, is the water. And why, you might ask, is the water dirty? On the remix we find a babe who is squatting down inside what looks like a derelict building. And she is taking a pee. There is water around. And the water is dirty. Is she made in London? That question remains unanswered. Off!
While we are on the subject of terrible single covers to do with trains, here come A-Ha and their song Train Of Thought. On the original front cover artwork is a sketchy drawing of the band members, the title of the song, the name of the band and some odd yellow and red squiggles. On the remix is a babe, sitting on a track, deep in thought. Perhaps she is thinking, 'where did I put my clothes?' as she seems to have forgotten to wear any, other than a pair of red high heel shows. Food for thought too? Strawberry!
This can get a little monotonous you know. Here we find Kelly Rowland and her single Train On A Track. but on the original single front cover artwork there are no trains, tracks or railway of any kinds, just a grinning Ms Rowland. On the remix we find a babe sitting on a track, with a train in the background. She is only wearing blue high heel shoes, which may not be that safe, but there is at least a train, on a track. Phew!
Who lives on Sun Street? Why, it's none other than Katrina And The Waves. Sadly, the original single front cover artwork does not show us what life on sun street is like, as all we can see are the band members. On the remix, though, we find a babe who is walking along a sunny street. It doesn't look as if anyone lives on that particular stretch of road, which might be as well, given that her dress seems to be far too short for her. A good job that it is sunny too, as otherwise, wearing that dress, she would catch a chill. Blonde!
Probably best known for their single Christmas Wrapping, The Waitresses did have other hits including I Know What Boys Like. Based on the original single front cover artwork, what boys like is a black and white photograph of themselves on a cheap plastic table cloth. The remix seems more realistic as a babe who really knows what boys like demonstrates her logic by sitting on a chair, naked other than her high heels. Positioning!
Hey, Gary Barlow, Let Me Go. That is what the fans are screaming. The original front cover artwork shows Mr Barlow sitting at a piano, he doesn't appear to be restricting anyone's movement in a way that would stop them from going wherever it is they wish to go. On the remix we find a babe, but no Mr Barlow, however she is chained up and unable to go somewhere, or anywhere. She is singing let me go, and hoping that Mr Barlow is going to rescue her. That depends on whether he likes women who are chained up. Go!
Being Left Outside Alone must be an occupational hazard for Anastacia. How do we know this? On the original single front cover artwork she is kneeling down by a window and a radiator, which is left to the outside (to the right is further inside), and she is alone. On the remix is a babe who went to the left and is sitting outside by a river, and she is alone. She is also alone from a clothing perspective, somewhat alone being only with her high heel shoes. A loan!
When you are Standing Outside The Fire, would you expect to see Garth Brooks there in his red chess-board shirt and cowboy hat? Possibly, but on the original single front cover artwork there is no sign of the fire to which the song's title alludes. On the remix we find two babes who are standing outside a fire, which is the safest place to be as they would get burned if they were standing inside the fire, especially as they are wearing no protective clothing. Singe!
Everything But The Girl (or EBTG as they're sometimes monikered) bring us an EP of Covers. The original Covers cover artwork covers the essentials: the name of the band, the title of the EP, and the names of the songs they are covering. On the remix we find a girl who is everything but covered, though she is covered by a small black dress. That about covers it for today's remix, or doesn't cover it if you're the girl on the remixed cover of Covers. Clear!