Happenin' All Over Again - Lonnie Gordon 
Tuesday, 19 February, 2013, 05:00 - Singles Of The 1990s
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lonnie gordon happenin all over again remixlonnie gordon happenin all over again 1What can we say about the cover of the Lonnie Gordon disco dance classic Happenin' All Over Again? Well, it's red. And it features Ms Gordon bending down with her legs apart. Now that's dangerous territory for a remix and indeed the remix pushes many of the boundaries that we, here at AllBum.Art like to set. Which leads to copious use of the 'blur' button on the remix which shows a different babe, in a similar pose, but with less clothes. Smear!
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Hunting For Witches - Bloc Party 
Monday, 18 February, 2013, 05:02 - Singles Of The 2000s
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bloc party hunting for witches remixbloc party hunting for witches 1Most people think that Hunting For Witches is only something that can be undertaken in October, around the time of Halloween, but that's just not true. Witches can be found at any time of year and are in fact easier to spot on sunny days rather than dark, dreary nights. Bloc Party therefore have it wrong on their original cover but in the remix we see a more modern-day witch hunter with a silver cross and a necklace of chillies. Hot!
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Mr Saxobeat - Alexandra Stan 
Sunday, 17 February, 2013, 05:08 - Singles Of The 2010s, One For The Ladies
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alexandra stan mr saxobeat 1Until Alexandra Stan came on the scene, few people had even heard of Romania, believing it to be one of the old former Soviet states that had now been subsumed back into it's old master. But no. It seems that Romania is nothing like that. Instead it's a land where sexy girls (lots of them) prance around singing pip-pap-pop songs with dodgy English accents. Mr Saxobeat was a chart topping pip-pap-pop song in so many countries around the world that Ms Stan was purported to have been offered the keys to the city of Romania in gratitude for her blatant publicity of the place as a hot bed of, well, hot beds.

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alexandra stan mr saxobeat remixRomania isn't a city you say? What is it then. These European countries are usually so small that they make even Canadian cities look big. But what does that matter. You're not hear for a geography lesson but to pick up some distastefully remixed artwork for your music collection. Ms Stan sings of Mr Saxobeat, a man of some legend whose saxophone, it seems, he plays like the pied piper of Hamlyn (is that in Romania perhaps?) to attract the sexy Romanian girls to his jam sessions. And by saxophone, they really do mean saxophone, not some metaphor for his dick which he swings around looking for it to be blown. And here he is in this remixed cover, Mr Saxobeat himself.

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alexandra stan mrs saxobeat remixNot to be outdone, the girls have their own version of Mr Saxobeat who is identified as Miranda and who likes to call herself Mr for short. So don't be fooled by the fact that the label of this remixed single says Mr Saxobeat, it's just that Miranda Saxobeat was too large to fit into the available space without using one of those squashed up fonts that's largely illegible. Now wouldn't it be great if Ms Mr Saxobeat got together with Mr Mr Saxobeat. If they were to wed, no change of name would be required, though perhaps a change of clothing may be required if they wanted to get dressed in most states of the US. Then again, maybe it's legal to get married naked in Romania. Anyone want to pay it a visit and find out?

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Relax - Frankie Goes To Hollywood 
Saturday, 16 February, 2013, 05:53 - Singles Of The 1980s
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frankie relax sleeve 1With lyrics that include the words...
Relax, don't do it
When you want to suck it to it
Relax, don't do it
When you want to cum.

..expectations for the cover sleeve of the single would naturally be high. And it doesn't disappoint. Some may argue that the 1985 cover of Relax by English band Frankie Goes To Hollywood is one of the few that doesn't require a remix of its own. It already features a pantie-less girl in high spiky heels and an even more spiky corset who is being held up by an Adonis like man wearing leather loin cloths. How erotic!

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frankie relax sleeve remixThere is an extent to which that is true, and remixing a cover that is already pretty outstandingly pretty outstanding might not be necessarily necessary. But remixed it has been. Now the girl on the cover is still wearing spiky heels and no panties, but her spiky corset has been replaced by her pointy nipples which stick out almost as much as the spikes on the corset of the girl on the original cover, which impressive because the original spikes were pretty outstandingly spiky. What about the guy? He's been replaced by another guy in a boxing ring outfit. Why? Why not? So, spikyness has been preserved and the remix holds as a remix worthy of publication. Don't agree? Just relax.

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Hot N Cold - Katy Perry 
Friday, 15 February, 2013, 05:40 - Singles Of The 2000s
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katy perry hot n cold 1Of course! How could anyone be so stupid! Except us perhaps. What the fuck has a picture of Katy Perry talking to a piece of fruit got to do with Hot N Cold? And by piece of fruit, it's not just the banana that's pictured in this version of the cover. Oh, no! There's other versions of the cover where she is talking to a piece of watermelon, a large red apple and even the rare Bonson fruit from southern Korea that only grows once every thirteen years on a Friday. The only explanation is that the fruit had been stored in a refrigerator, or maybe even a freezer, and then had been rapidly heated in a microwave such that elements of it were hot and others cold. If that is the case (and it seems most likely), surely the addition of 'stink lines' to equate to steam rising, as well as a few icicles, would have made the situation much the clearer.

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katy perry hot n cold remixThe remixed cover makes no such additional adornments necessary. What is going on here is clear for all to see. What we have is a sexy babe who is hot. The fact that she seems prepared to flash her naked body to the world makes her even more hot. But wait. She is standing in a very snowy scene. There is snow as far as the eyes can see. This can only mean one thing: It's cold. So add 2 to 2 and what do you get. In this case 4, where 4 means a girl who is both hot, and cold. If Ms Perry wishes to learn the subtle art of making covers for her future singles, then perhaps she could learn a lot from the girl on this cover. Speaking openly, we would be happy to learn whatever it was she is teaching. How's about you?

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Are You Ready For Love - Patsy Gallant 
Thursday, 14 February, 2013, 05:30 - Albums Of The 1970s, Singles Of The 1970s
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patsy gallant are you ready 1Here's something of an anomaly, a singer from Canada that isn't either Mr Adams or Mr Buble. In fact it's not a Mr at all, but the shapely 70s figure of Patsy Gallant. The cover of her single (and album) Are You Ready For Love is even more unusual for a Canadian piece of artwork as it doesn't depict either snow or mounties (those police on horses), both of which it is well known that Canada leads the world in, though it is close to being beaten for snow by the Russian state of Siberia. Ms Gallant is wearing a fetching red dress on the cover which is blowing about to reveal her matching red panties and her high heel red sandals. Now if only the wind would blow a bit harder...

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patsy gallant are you ready remixThey (whoever 'they' are) say that you should be careful what you wish for in case it comes true. As it turns out, no mention of a wish was made, but it might be easy to see why the statement 'now if only the wind would blow a bit harder...' might be taken to indicate some desire for the dress to be raised even higher to see what might be revealed. Thankfully in this remixed cover, no such breeze-based enhancements are required as it appears the girl who has replaced Ms Gallant has already lost her dress. And her panties. And her bra too, or so it would seem. At least she still has her high heel shoes. That must be quite a comfort to her.

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Bullet With Butterfly Wings - The Smashing Pumpkins 
Wednesday, 13 February, 2013, 05:18 - Singles Of The 1990s
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smashing pumpkins bullet 1What a relief to return to the land of the free to do some work on this 1995 single from The Smashing Pumpkins. Bullet With Butterfly Wings was widely acclaimed for its musicianship. But what about that cover? Where to begin? Where, for one, is any connection to the band itself? Second, there seems to be on connection whatsoever to a bullet of any kind (only in your wildest imagination could, perhaps, the rip in the page have been caused by a bullet but the cut is so clean and symetrical that it is highly unlikely). Lastly, where's the butterfly? Overall the cover scores 0 out of 10, even if the song is a rock classic.

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smashing pumpkins bullet remixLike many songs it is both likely and possible that there is a likelihood of the possibility of the name of the song and it's awful cover, being a metaphor for something else. Like a rabbit with a headache or something. But analyzing it further is not going to produce any sense so instead the cover has been replaced by a naked girl wearing butterfly wings. Why? Well, it stems from the fact that the title has the word butterfly in it mostly. That, and the fact that the naked girl is very cute and would look great on the cover of any single (whether that be a single song or a single guy). That obvious enough for you?

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Angels - Robbie Williams 
Tuesday, 12 February, 2013, 05:04 - Singles Of The 1990s
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robbie williams angels 1No. Sorry. Don't understand a word of it. The e-mail that arrived with this remixed cover comes from, apparently, someone calling themself Tabbo of Manchester in England. Tabbo says he knows about this site and then says:
Youze aarn't fekk'n doddlin' it reet.

Aarn't it indeed? Well rather than leave you with the rest of Tabbo's musings on Mr William's and his cover, instead the original is presented here for your reference. According to Tabbo:
Hezz fekk'n twat haircut is shite.

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robbie williams angels remixWhat a relief to find that Tabbo's work on remixing the cover in the AllBum.Art style has yielded something that is both a vast improvement over the original picture of Mr Williams, but is also comprehensible. Given the rest of the 'tripe' spoken by Tabbo, you might have expected his remixed single cover for Angels to have been some drug crazed nonsense. But instead it shows two picturesque angels. It is often said that drugs brings out the best in people, at least by drug addicts if no-one else. Though not even Tabbo would be bold enough to make that statement. He can have the last word:
Themz fekk'n birds is bang-up dolly-mix

Whatever that means...

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Angel Of Harlem - U2 
Monday, 11 February, 2013, 05:53 - Singles Of The 1980s
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u2 angel of harlem 1Ah, 1988, what a year. It was the year that came before 1989 and the year that came after 1987. And even more interestingly, it was the year that U2 released the single Angel Of Harlem. What many people do not recognize is that if you take all of the letters in Angel Of Harlem, and add them together (using their position in the alphabet as a number), then square this number, it doesn't add up to 1988. The subliminal message in the song comes from this cover which, on the face of it, is incredibly boring. What on earth were they thinking about. Since when has a bored looking guy sat around in morbid black and white had anything to do with either angels or Harlem. Maybe that's the point. Or maybe there isn't a point.

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u2 angel of harlem remixWhat this cover needs is a damned good, yes damned good, remix. Harlem is one of those up-and-coming aspirational districts where stuff is happening. So let's make the cover aspirational and up-and-coming. Gone is the bored looking guy, and in his place is a hot looking angel. What's it got to do with U2. Nothing particularly but does that really matter. Surely Bono and his buddies would approve of this angel who, it has to be said, if she had been on the original cover, would probably have catapulted this single from the obscurity of number 14 in the hot 100, to the dizzy heights of number 12, or even number 11.

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(You Gotta) Fight For Your Right (To Party!) - Beastie Boys 
Sunday, 10 February, 2013, 05:12 - Singles Of The 1980s
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beastie boys fight for your right 1Kick It! No, that is not a reference to the bucket which Beastie Boy Adam Yauch sadly kicked in 2012, but is the now infamous opening line from the Beastie Boys classic 1986 single (You Gotta) Fight For Your Right (To Party!) The very 1980s cover (in the sense that it's a very over everything, over cluttered, over colorful and over complicated) carries the name of the band, the title of the song and a picture of the Beastie Boys looking, well, very 80s. It's probably the hats and the sunglasses that do it, because it doesn't appear to be raining (hence no need for a hat), nor does it appear to be overly sunny (hence no need for the glasses) and so the band are over dressed, adding to the overly nature of the whole cover.

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beastie boys fight for yourright remixYou should never speak ill of the dead, but we thing Mr Yauch would forgive the replacement of his picture with one that better sums up the whole track. Instead of the picture of the 'Boys, we instead see a couple of girls who are clearly fighting hard. It is only this extreme level of fighting that could possibly be appropriate if the outcome of the battle was the right to party. Never mind human rights, or constitutional rights, the right to party is something that should be a universal human norm, and should not require any fight. But if you are going to fight, make two girls do it in the nude, that's the best way by far. In fact, it almost represents a party in itself, so in a way, no matter who wins, at least they will both have had a party.

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