Erotica - Madonna 
Monday, 4 February, 2013, 05:22 - Albums Of The 1990s
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erotica madonna 1Another cover taken from the time when Ms Ciccone was publicly into getting naughty. This is the cover from Madonna's 1992 album Erotica which was published alongside a book called Sex. The book contained many photos of Ms Ciccone in many states of dress and undress. The album cover on the other hand, does not. That being said, the fact that the cover of the album only shows the facial features of Ms Ciccone is not conclusive evidence that she is wearing clothes, but neither is it a dead cert that she is. The pictures in the book left no such question unanswered and included a picture of Ms Ciccone hitch-hiking naked on a busy city street.

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erotica madonna remixIt only seems right that the remixed version of this cover should replay this particular photograph from Ms Ciccone's book Sex. And here she is, standing at the edge of a road, wearing nothing but a pair of heels (and a handbag) and sticking her thumb out to request some passing motorist to give her a lift. The concept of naked hitch-hiking is not unique to Ms Ciccone. It has been said that it is by far one of the best ways to ensure that a girl gets the lift that she desires. It has been known to cause problems though, both by distracting drivers who drive past, as well as causing extreme distraction to the driver who eventually gives the girl a lift. So shame on you Ms Ciccone for promoting such potentially dangerous activities.

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Chapel Of Love - The Dixie Cups 
Sunday, 3 February, 2013, 22:12 - Singles Of The 1960s
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dixie cups chapel of love 1We're goin' to the chapel and we're, gonna get ma-a-a-ried. Is that so? Well in 1964 that's what The Dixie Cups were singing in their song Chapel Of Love. Here at AllBum.Art it's true to say that there have been quite a few songs about weddings that have featured as cover art remixes, and this one will add to that collection. In the original cover we see what exactly? Some cups (Dixie ones perhaps) and what appear to be miniature mannequins of a bride and groom, the kind that normally sit on top of a wedding cake. All things considered, not that bad as covers go as it features cups and a wedding theme. But that doesn't mean it can't be improved upon.

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dixie cups chapel of love remixWhat was missing from the original cover has been included in this remixed version. Gone are the paper cups and in their place, three ladies. One of them is meant to be a bride and the other two her bridesmaids. Are they goin' to a chapel? No, they are in a hotel by the looks of things. Are they goin' to get ma-a-a-ried? Well if they did that would make them both lesbians (as they are all girls) and bigamists (as there are more than two of them). That being said, they do appear to be very friendly, perhaps more friendly than just the bride/bridesmaid relationship might suggest. Maybe they are in New York to take advantage of that state's liberal laws on these things. Anyone fancy joining them?

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My Boy Lollipop - Millie 
Saturday, 2 February, 2013, 05:08 - Singles Of The 1960s
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millie my boy lollipop 1One of those 1960s songs that seems to have stood the test of time, My Boy Lollipop sees the sickly sweet voice of Millie singing lots of lyrics that revolve around glucose based confectionary. The cover of the single, on the other hand, does not offer us any insight into this world of candy-coated love. Instead we see Millie herself against a blue background. The choice of blue is odd, as it's probably one of the least common colors for candy and being an upbeat, happy-go-pappy kind of song the connection of the color blue with its regular connotation of melancholy does nothing to lift this rather sour, dour cover out of the blues.

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millie my boy lollipop remixIn the remixed cover, many of the problems of the earlier cover have been fixed. There is one minor point, and that is that Millie has been replaced by an alternative lady, but given the alternative lady's state of dress (or undress) it is unlikely that this would cause too many complaints. What is great about the remixed cover is that the new cover-girl is sucking on a lollipop. And not just any lollipop but a bright red one. Maybe strawberry flavored, or raspberry, or cranberry or redcurrent. What the flavor is matters little, but the dash of red inflames the senses and cheers up this otherwise dull blue cover, revealing much more of the sugary, giddy-up nature of the song itself. In fact it's much more revealing in many ways.

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Love Is A Battlefield - Pat Benetar 
Friday, 1 February, 2013, 05:09 - Singles Of The 1980s
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pat benetar love is a 1An American classic from Pat Benetar, Love Is A Battlefield is one of those songs that's timeless. Or at least if you use airplay to define what's timeless, then this is on the list as it's still played on the radio like there's no tomorrow. Anyhow, the cover of the single shows Ms Benetar in a rather odd pose. Perhaps this is meant to be her attempt to show what a love-based battlefield looks like. The fact is that you can't see what else is going on either behind, below, or in front of Ms Benetar and it's difficult to imagine what this might be from the scant information provided by the cover. Is she, for example, mid-punch against some floozie that she has taken a dislike to, or maybe she's just been punched herself. The mind boggles. The cover doesn't.

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pat benetar love is a remixSo that there can be no confusion, in the remixed cover, Ms Benetar has been replaced by two floozies who look very much like they are in the mood to battle it out for love. The battlefield in this case is a boxing ring, and the two floozies have their gloves on and are facing off ready for a punch up. In the red corner is a redhead who, for the sake of argument we shall call 'Paula'. In the blue corner we have a blonde who, for the sake of argument we shall call 'Britney'. Let the argument commence, and the battle ensue. The things we do for love! Oh, wait, that's a different song isn't it.

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Whole Lotta Love - Led Zeppelin 
Thursday, 31 January, 2013, 05:57 - Singles Of The 1970s
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led zeppelin whole lotta love 1Na nah na nah nah, doo-doo, doo-doot. Na nah na nah nah, doo-doo, doo-doot. Yes, it's a Whole Lotta Love according to this 1970 single from Led Zeppelin. But oh, what a dismal cover for the single they have. And what on Earth is all this No.1 Super Group nonsense? Talk about talking yourself up. There are many artists who could claim super-group status. Are Led Zeppelin one of them? Well not if the lack of inventiveness in this cover is anything to go by. A picture of the band, and not even a very good picture at that. On a white background. With the whole super-band thing sprawled across the front. And a title in red. Marks out of 10? 1. Perhaps that's what the No.1 refers to in their self proclaimed excellence.

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led zeppelin whole lotta love remixNow this is more like it. There is unquestionably a whole lot of love going on here. Or at least there will be once any passing male gets their hands on one (or more) of these lovely ladies. These girls definitely deserve a super-group badge but are modest enough to cover that up. If you don't like women who are ample in the bosom department, then perhaps they are not your idea of a whole lot of love, but there is no way to deny that there is a whole lot of bosom and that for those who would like to get their hands on them, that would translate into literally tons of love. Literally tons of weight. Literally tons of fun. Na nah na nah nah, doo-doo, doo-doot.

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Black Or White - Michael Jackson 
Wednesday, 30 January, 2013, 05:48 - Singles Of The 1990s
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michael jackson black or white 1Is he or isn't he? He certainly was originally. Later, perhaps he wasn't. The question of whether Michael Jackson was Black Or White was a regular discussion in many bars across the nation, at least it was when anyone could give a damn. In this song, Mr Jackson says that it doesn't matter whether you are black or white. But what if you're neither of these? What about yellow, pink or brown. Or if you are from Alpha Centuri and are green, then what? Or silver? Mr Jackson probably meant to say that it really doesn't matter what color you are, you will still look like a complete idiot trying to do the moonwalk.

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michael jackson black or white remixWhat the original cover for this 1991 single provides is any true test as to whether it matters or not whether you, or anyone else for that matter, is black or white. The remixed cover allows you to take this decision for yourself. Mr Jackson's spooky eyebrows have been replaced by a black girl, and a white girl, in a close embrace. It is down to you to decide whether it matters what color you are, or they are, or green aliens from Alpha Centuri are. But from the looks of the two girls, either will do just fine and there can be no doubt that either of them are a damn sight better at letting you make a decision on color than Mr Jackson is.

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Only Girl (In The World) - Rihanna 
Tuesday, 29 January, 2013, 05:35 - Singles Of The 2010s
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rihanna only girl 1Rihanna is another one who is asking for it. No, not that. But to have her covers remixed. That said, this single from 2010 marked a strong departure from her earlier tracks in that it is less dark and sexualized. Only Girl (In The World) has Ms Fenty singing about how she wants to be made to feel like the only girl in the world. It might not appear it from its upbeat sound, but the song is actually about nuclear holocaust and how, afterwards, only Ms Fenty would survive. This is because of her red hair and her ability to stand in a field full of corn with her red dress being held to cover her boobs instead of actually wearing it.

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rihanna only girl remixIn this remix (which would have contravened the 'tits and bums only' policy if it hadn't been for a careful application of blur) Ms Fenty has been replaced by another redhead, who is also standing in a field. Her replacement looks a lot like 80's pop princess Tiffany. Like Ms Fenty, she has also learnt that by carrying her dress in her hands instead of wearing it, together with having died red hair, the effects of the nuclear weapons are nullified. She is also, the only girl in the world and... oops... there are two of them now. It might be better to change the title to Only Girls (In The World) but that would defeat the nuclear resistant message of the song. Maybe Tiffany's song I Think We're Alone Now referred directly to this situation.

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Born In The USA - Bruce Springsteen 
Monday, 28 January, 2013, 12:45 - Singles Of The 1980s
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bruce springsteen born in the usa 1An all American classic like Apple Pie and July the 4th, Born In The USA is an 80's classic of its own by Bruce Springsteen. The cover for the single is relatively minimalist but almost has the essentials. Firstly, Mr Springsteen is pictured, in full rock-star electric guitar playing style. You can almost hear the chord that he is strumming. He is set against a red, white and blue backdrop that isn't totally dissimilar to the old star spangled banner itself. The main difference being the stars which have been replaced by the title of the song itself. 4 out of 5 perhaps? (Incidentally, you can rate any of the pictures by clicking the blobs at the bottom of each entry).

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bruce springsteen born in the usa remix 1Achieving a remix of this cover was never going to be easy. It's like remixing the white house. For starters you can't take away the red, white and blueness, that would just be plain wrong. But what can be done is to remix Mr Springsteen himself. So instead of his rock-star physique he has been replaced by a physique of a different type. Yes, Mr Springsteen has been replaced by a sexy all-American cheerleader type wearing a patriotic bikini. Though there is only one of her, she is clearly a shining star thereby putting the stars back into the spangled banner. She is an American model who is, it is true to say, is born in the USA. God bless America!

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Superstition - Stevie Wonder 
Sunday, 27 January, 2013, 05:35 - Singles Of The 1970s
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stevie wonder superstition 1As the classic 1970s guitar kicks in you prepare yourself for some proper 70's funk. That marks the introduction to this classic from Stevie Wonder from 1972. Superstition is one of those songs that gets people a-twistin' and a-groovin' on dancefloors even today. The cover, on the other hand, is almost totally dismal in comparison. Just a silhouette of Mr Wonder, his name and the title of the song (which is in a font so large that it doesn't even fit across the cover). The use of an =equals= sign to hyphenate the word is odd. Nothing particularly superstitious about it though.

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stevie wonder superstition remix 1A classic such as this doesn't need that much of a remix. But rather than leave Mr Wonder on his own, we've brought along a couple of sexy girls to dance behind him. They are silhouetted too, but seem to be wearing very little and may even be naked. Unfortunately asking Mr Wonder what they were wearing is a little pointless, and unless they happened to make a lot of noise whilst a-groovin' then Mr Wonder may not even have realized that they were present. Then again, maybe they came and sat on his lap (in the presence of such funk royalty it is only to be expected) in which case he will be able to tell us much more about them!

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Embrace - Fragma 
Saturday, 26 January, 2013, 05:00 - Albums Of The 2000s
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fragma embrace 1What do we have here? An attractive blonde, squatting down, in a pretty dress in some kind of ragged yet picturesque blue-washed area. How this relates to the title of the album or the cover is totally unknown. The blonde in question does not even appear to be the singer for Fragma's 2002 album Embrace so perhaps they just used a mildly sexy picture to try and improve sales of the album. Also, quite possibly, it is intended to attract the kind of club DJs who would play the kind of music that Fragma make. Whatever the reason, it fails the two primary tests of a good cover in that it does not feature the band, nor does it in any way reflect the title of the album.

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fragma embrace remixThe original cover dates from 2002 and the blonde girl pictured on it will now be over 10 years older. And guess what... there is a more up-to-date picture of her available on the Internet. As such this is less of a remixed or remade cover and more of a straightforward update. The other thing that has changed is that the blue-washed area is now a sight more derelict than it was, and some of it has actually collapsed revealing a wild green area behind. There is one other change, and that is that the pretty dress that was originally being worn has, over the intervening years, evaporated (as such dresses have a tendency to do) leaving the lady wearing nothing more than her shoes. To protect her embarrassment at this unfortunate deterioration in her situation, she had has to embrace her greater embarrassment with her hands. So the picture at least now has some connection with the name of the album. It is to be hoped that she manages to find some other work to keep her busy soon, before the whole area is demolished to make way for some new expressway or skyscraper.

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With thanks to Bart for the tip off on this one.
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